How we can teach children to stand firm when facing bullying.

Every week when we talk to parents, caregivers, and teachers, one thing becomes clearer and clearer: our children need more than our love and protection. They also need real-life skills that help them stay confident when they face bullying. And this bullying doesn’t always come from other children. Sometimes it comes from adults, teachers with sharp words, older relatives at home, or even caregivers who use fear to control children.

Research shows that when children learn how to handle bullying early, they build resilience, an inner strength that helps them throughout their lives. Experts like Dr. Dan Siegel explain that when we teach children how to protect themselves emotionally and logically, we help strengthen the part of their brain that supports confidence, self-control, and decision-making.

So what does this mean for us as parents and teachers?

First, let’s accept that bullying happens everywhere.

We understand child-to-child bullying well: name-calling, teasing, exclusion. But we also need to acknowledge adult-to-child bullying, teachers who embarrass a child in front of the class, caregivers who threaten them, or even parents who use harsh, belittling words. This type of bullying can be even more harmful because it comes from someone the child is supposed to trust.

Children watch us more than they listen to us. When we create homes and schools where bullying is not tolerated, they learn that they deserve respect.

Teach them simple, strong language to stand up for themselves.

Researchers like Dr. Ross Greene emphasize giving children words they can use when they feel disrespected or hurt. Not to fight back, but to speak up with confidence.

We can teach them to say:

• “I don’t like what you’re doing. Please stop.”

• “If you speak to me in that tone, I can’t continue this conversation.”

When we practice these with them, even casually at home, they learn how to stay calm and assertive when things get tough.

Let’s be the adults they can count on.

Children cope better when they know there is someone who will listen without judgment. The American Academy of Pediatrics notes that children with at least one reliable adult are far less likely to experience long-term harm from bullying.

So sometimes the most powerful thing we can say is:

“If anyone treats you badly, tell me right away. I’m here for you.”

It sounds simple, but it builds a deep sense of safety.

Don’t ignore the quiet signs.

Not all children will tell us what’s going on. Some will show us instead:

• refusing to go to school

• crying more than usual

• difficulty sleeping

• becoming unusually quiet

These aren’t “bad behaviors.” They’re signals. They’re the child’s way of saying, “Something is wrong.” If an adult responds harshly to these signs, we risk pushing the child deeper into fear. Instead, we can ask: “This child seems hurt. How can we help?” It opens a softer, more supportive conversation.

Build confidence without encouraging aggression.

Confidence doesn’t just appear, it grows through experience. We can encourage children to join debates, drama clubs, music, art, or team sports. Research from the University of Illinois shows that these activities build self-efficacy, the belief that “I can handle this. ”Children who feel capable are less likely to be bullied and more likely to speak up when something is wrong.

Lastly, let’s teach them to walk with confidence, every day.

This is something we build slowly, with patience and daily connection. Ask them simple questions like: “Did anyone say something today that made you feel bad?”

And when they open up, let’s listen. Let’s validate their feelings. Let’s empower them. And let’s remind them that bullying is never acceptable, whether it comes from another child or an adult.

Because when we stand with them, we help raise a generation that knows its value, speaks up with courage, and stands strong in a world that isn’t always gentle.

Prepared by C-Sema's Communications Team.